This hilarious short story tells a tale of one of God’s beloved U.S. Marines who received a ‘Dear John’ letter from his girlfriend while he was on deployment in Satan’s sandbox, otherwise known as Afghanistan.
A Marine stationed in Afghanistan received a letter from his girlfriend that she had cheated on him, not once but twice.
Her letter read as follows:
I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice since you have been gone, and it is not fair to either of us. I am sorry. Please return the picture of me that I sent to you.
The Marine, with his feelings in a complete wreck, asked his fellow Marines for any photographs they could spare of their girlfriends, sisters, ex-girlfriends, aunts, cousins, wives, ex-wives and so forth. In addition to returning Becky’s picture as she requested, he included all of the pictures that he had been given from his fellow men of war.
There was a total of 57 photographs in that envelope, along with this note to her:
I am so sorry, but I cannot quite remember who the f*ck you are. If you would not mind, please take your picture from the pile of those I have been able to find and send the rest back to me.
This is a fictional tale from an episode of M.A.S.H. but it paints a very good picture of what might happen should you trifle with a United States Marine.